Praan

Why do I still get angry and cynical? It surprises me... even with my new perspective on things. I don't like that part of me. "If you look for the worst in people, you're sure to find it."  I'm a bit disappointed in myself. I need a swatter to smack me on the head every time I think negative thoughts.

"GRRRR, that person bumped into me and didn't seem to care."  *THWACK*
"That guy on the freeway cut me off..." *THWACK*
"People are always so noisy..." *THWACK*

If I stop looking for the bad things, maybe the world won't seem so bad after all.

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A long time ago, when I was idealistic and romantic, I used to believe I could travel anywhere. I read a lot of travelogues and journals of people who traveled. I wanted to find the courage to take the first step to follow that dream of mine..

I remember talking to a person who once traveled, and she told me something I could never forget.
"If you stay just one more day, you could probably find a million reasons why you shouldn't leave... things like 'it isn't the right time' or 'money problems.' When you realize that's about to happen, just go, right at that moment. "

Sometimes my heart still longs for that. To just go and travel the world, meet people... and hold my breath seeing the most breathtaking things in the world..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlfKdbWwruY&feature=dir

"Where the Hell is Matt" made me remember.
What's stopping me from all that?
Everything..
And nothing.

I'm not such an idealistic boy anymore. I know the world isn't filled with people dancing around and laughing in harmony. It's a nice picture though. I want to believe in it.
Maybe, just maybe, I'm not alone in this.
Maybe there are others who want the same thing.
Or am I just being idealistic again?

We're not all that different, are we? In the end, maybe not. No matter how different I feel, or how complicated human relationships can get..
I'd like to believe we're not all that different. Even if we are, hehe.