second_flight: (Sky)
Somewhere along the line, I came to wonder whether life was worth living, and it's a question that's plagued me all these years. Was anything really worth it? Well.. I finally started to understand the things that were important to me, the things that were worth my time.
So my answer to this question right now is... "Yes, it can be," and perhaps even to a certain point.. "We can make it worth living."

Many of my friends know this too, like we're all at that age where we intrinsically understand this. it's interesting to see how we all developed in different ways but have come to this same point in life. If I can compare it to something, I think it would be like climbing to a peak of a high mountain, and you're wondering to yourself what's next. You've seen things, you've conquered, and you look towards the future.

The funny thing for me is that I really haven't accomplished much in the social and economic sense. I'm not famous or wealthy, but I never really was striving for those things. I haven't even really conquered anything per se either, but I look at the younger generation and I realize just how much more I understand things than they do. I think it's akin to gracefully being able to say no while everyone else scrambles at the opportunity to say yes. It's the ability to hold your ground while everything else gets swept away.

I do think experiencing new things is worthwhile, but it's also important to understand limits. Personally for me, I still like to throw myself at everything that piques my curiosity, but at the same time, I know when I need to stop. I know when I'm happy. If it seems like I'm settling for less, I don't really care, because I don't want anything to compromise the balance I've found.

The clincher here is that I still don't have a definite answer to what I want in life. Yes, life is worth living to me at least, but I don't know what it's worth living for. So many different pieces floating in this ambiguous fog where answers don't ever seem to crystallize. I don't expect that it ever will.


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